Happy Cinco de Mayo — How to Drink Tequila Like a Mexican

Thursday, May 5, 2016


Hello my Lovlies!!!!! Since today is Cinco de Mayo I searched the internet to find something suitable for this festive occasion. I came up with the following courtesy of Indiana Jo (thank you).


How to Drink Tequila Like a Mexican

Do you have a (completely rational) fear of tequila? Do you flat-out hate the stuff? If so, I can almost guarantee that you’re drinking it wrong. After spending a year in Mexico, I finally learned the secret: how to drink tequila like a Mexican… and actually enjoy this potent drink.
How To Drink Tequila Like a Mexican 
European/American/Canadian [insert your country here]. 

(*delete as appropriate)
Photo by: scani
More often that not, it goes a little something like this:
  1. Enter bar, consume a dozen or so other drinks.
  2. Realize it’s past midnight and a) you want to dance or b) you still feel too sober to call it a good Friday night.
  3. Shout to your friends, “Tequilas?!”
  4. After a mixed reactions of “hell yeahs” (from the people who think they’re sober but definitely aren’t) and “urghhh, I hate tequila” (from the people who are actually sober), head to the bar.
  5. Ordering process: “[x number of] tequilas please.”
  6. Return to friends with tray full of evil clear liquid in shot glasses complete with a scattering of lime wedges and salt.
  7. Add salt to back of hand. Deep breath.
  8. Get a wedge of lime ready to drown out the tequila pain. Take another deep breath.
  9. Get beer bottle within grabbing distance, in case the lime doesn’t work. Double deep breath.
  10. Round of chanting with friends.
  11. “One…”
  12. “Two…”
  13. “Wait!!!!! Brian’s not ready.”
  14. Brian, who was trying to get out of the whole tequila drinking business, is forced by peer pressure to pick up his glass.
  15. “One….two…three.”
  16. Lick salt.
  17. Throw the tequila towards your mouth.
  18. Gag.
  19. Try to swallow as your throat closes in protest.
  20. Swallow harder while trying to breathe through your nose.
  21. Finally swallow the liquid which burns all the way down to your stomach.
  22. Shove a ridiculously large amount of sharp citrus into your mouth and suck on it like you’re a new-born given your first dummy/pacifier.
  23. Discard lime, take huge swig of beer and wipe tears from your eyes.
  24. Cheer at the round of empty glasses and breathe a secret sigh of relief that it’s over…
  25. Until some b@stard (who think’s they’re sober but really isn’t) shouts “Another round!”
Often, after the first tequila, this process is repeated until your memory turns blank in the way it would do if you were hit in the back of the head by a shovel – which actually feels as though it might have happened when you wake up the next morning, fully clothed, lying face down in the running position wondering why, why, why and swearing never again.
Okay my Lovlies does sound like your tequila experience?  If so, give me a 


.



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